Category: Personal

I am of the belief that everything happens for a reason. Some people are quick to write this sentiment off as a type of coping mechanism for when life is going down the drain and nothing works out the way you want. 

We go to the theater and we watch movies about heroes – as well as average joes – who are kicked down again and again. Regardless, they continue their fight or journey towards righteousness and are rewarded in the end. 

In the modern medium of film, every single event in a screenplay leads up to its ending. I believe that no matter how much you’re kicked down, if you continue your journey and live as a good person, you will be rewarded.

Maybe this is my 22-year-old naivete speaking and 20 years from now, when I’m still sitting in the theater, writing reviews in my mind, this belief will have been long-evaporated. But for now, I hold this belief strongly.

Since I was a young child, I knew I was going to make films as an adult. I did not know what I would make but I knew I would make something.

Bad News

I started really taking my career seriously in my late teens and there were many incredible opportunities I missed out on as a filmmaker. For months, even years, these bygone gigs haunted me in a way that felt almost cruel.

Me at 19-years-old, in desperate need of a haircut.

When I was 19-years-old, there was a rapper/musician for whom I was supposed to make several music videos – that fell through. After those videos failed to get past the planning stage, he gained hundreds of thousands of fans on social media, signed a million dollar record deal, was featured in esteemed magazines, etc.

You get the idea. Those videos that could have been haunted me until I was 21-years-old. 

Two years after our plans to work together crumbled, the artist was on the run from the police following a psychotic break that (allegedly) resulted in him stabbing his girlfriend with a boxcutter. Thankfully, she lived.

Legally, it is still up in the air as to what actually happened that day but I remember sitting on Miami Beach and opening my phone to see his horrifying mugshot for the first time. I now felt haunted in a way completely different to what I felt before but I was also thankful that those videos never happened. I was thankful for my safety and sanity.

What I really wanted was not what I needed. 

Good News and then Bad News Again

What I call my first “religious experience” with a movie occurred when I was freshly 15. Yes I loved movies, but this one shook me to my core and I hated how it felt at first. But that film never left my mind for years, no matter how hard I tried.

A few years later, I was now a super fan of the man who directed it. His art motivated me in a way few other filmmakers had and, for me, breathed life into a medium that many say is dying.

When this director moved to Miami and opened a studio, I was shocked. I was 20-years-old and decided to message anyone I could find who was associated with the studio. I eventually got in contact with one of the head honchos at the project who told me there would be a party thrown by the studio and he could get me in.

All day, I was shaking with nervousness. “I might finally meet him,” I thought. At the door, the bouncer checked my ID and said, “You’re not 21. You can’t come in.”

I pleaded and told him I was on the guest list and that I knew the guys throwing the event. Still, I was not allowed in.

As I waited outside for a possible chance to sneak in, it was eerily cold for a Miami night. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a man wearing a mask walk out of the club and into the parking lot. “That’s the boss,” one of the studio employees whispered to the bouncer.

My favorite film director was ten feet in front of me and I no longer felt any sort of nervousness or enthusiasm. He was just a person. I didn’t want to bother him and went home.

But wait, there’s more!

A little more than a year later, some of the employees at the studio noticed an Instagram page I had been running with my friends where I write music articles and showcase my work. So they invited us for a personal tour of the studio. 

“The boss” was not there but it was the most inspiring and fun day of my life. I now know that, one day, I’ll meet him.

Everyone has their moment.

I did not want to get into specifics about who is who because I believe everyone has stories like these: events in their life where one door closed and it hurt really bad, but it was okay because a better door opened soon after. Everyone has their “movie moment.”

I do not think it should be seen as silly to believe that everything happens for a reason. Even though I haven’t lived much life yet, this phenomenon has been proven to me more than enough to be believable.

Maybe it’s God, maybe it’s luck. Who knows? Regardless, if you want something, you should try. If nothing works out, wait a little. You may be pleasantly surprised.

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A story by Jack Tellier

The day I got a taste of what it felt like to truly be free is one I’ll never forget. I was in sixth grade; my kid brother and I were annoying our mother on a Saturday morning. She hadn’t had her cup of coffee and was busy cleaning the house. She also told us to clean repeatedly and when we refused to follow her directions, she aggressively asked us “why don’t you guys go somewhere and not come back until the sun is setting?” 

It took me too long to realize that she was only half serious. But today, I had an opportunity to develop some much-desired independence. What does this have to do with movies? There’s a reason I’m telling this story.

As a child, especially in middle school, I was frustrated with my lack of control over seemingly every situation. I could never drive anywhere, do what I wanted to do, see my friends whenever I wanted, eat wherever I wanted and I especially knew I was not skilled enough to make the types of movies I wanted to make. For hours, I would sit and watch YouTube tutorials on special effects that I could never replicate with a hand-me-down camera and Windows MovieMaker. I was fascinated, but powerless. I felt like Lily in the episode of “Modern Family,” when her parents held her on a leash at Disneyland.

I know how it feels, kid.

Today was a day to feel I could claim some of that control I had wanted my entire life. My brother and I biked to my good friend, Christian’s, house. He still lives at the same address today. We were going to explore the woods – alone. With this new air of confidence, we made our way to a special chainlink fence in the neighborhood. At the bottom of the fence, there was a hole someone had dug in the dirt so we could get on our bellies and crawl underneath.

View of “Frenchman’s Reserve,” the site of my potential disappearance.

We were now in the great unknown with no food, water, compass or anything. I was thrilled to be free but my cat would miss me. Just kidding, I never had a cat. We explored the woods for what felt like hours, stumbling across exotic looking plants and thankfully no bobcats. There had been multiple recently-posted signs warning us of these ferocious felines. Getting mauled would have made this story much more unpleasant.

When trying to get back home we were faced with two ponds surrounded by cattails. The fence was on the other side of the ponds and between the water was what looked like a dirt trail. I poked the trail with my stick and quickly realized it wasn’t dirt, but a thick, black sludge of some sort.

Obviously, as a sixth grader I thought, “If I run fast enough, I won’t sink in it!” I was the first one to try and my legs immediately got stuck in the sludge. I sank in it up to my knees and began to panic. Would people share photos of me as a “missing child” on Facebook? Would I get an obituary in the New York Times? I was already imagining my own memorial service.

I screamed. Christian and my brother pulled me out of the mud and we ran. We found a clearing in the woods that fed right back into the neighborhood, no fence-crawling needed. I also learned that day that fate is a cruel mistress. As luck would have it, the three of us came out of the forest and right there, in her black SUV was my mom searching for us. Christian’s mom was also with her. 

It’s safe for you to assume that Christian and I didn’t see each other for a while outside of school. All three of us got an earful when we returned home.

For years, I didn’t understand why leaving the house, like my mom demanded, got me in so much trouble. But at least I knew what it was like to be free.

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“Jack, what’s your favorite movie?” is never an easy question for me to answer.

My “favorite” film is vastly different from any of my other favorites. I also never know if I should tell the person my favorite movie to watch over and over or my favorite movie to examine.

Some of my “favorites” are films I never rewatch because they are so bleak or upsetting, yet I still love the emotional power they hold.

Depending on who you are and what I’m feeling, you may get a different answer from me.

Obviously, if you’re a stranger, I’ll talk with you about my more palatable and well-known favorites. I hate being the guy to explain some disturbing art film I’m into at the moment. I find it really embarrassing sometimes and try to always avoid coming across as pretentious.

It is a dilemma I have struggled with for quite some time now and it has led to me being rather secretive about the films I love. Is it really my favorite if I don’t enjoy watching it?

Well, it’s time I showcase some of my favorite films and let you, yes you, decide if our tastes align at all.

Although my favorites are always changing, my new gallery lists ten films that I have loved for a somewhat long time. The list is comprised of movies that I can rewatch constantly and some that I don’t think I’ll watch for another decade.

It was not an easy process picking these movies and I refrained from including my own film, “Jit.”

The films are not necessarily ranked, but I tried to include films that convey different types of messages, look vastly different and come from different genres.

A superhero film, a documentary, a musical, dramas, art films, lighthearted comedies, a black comedy, what else could you ask for?

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By Jack Tellier

When a film is released, it is nothing short of a miracle. Most critics could never make one themselves.

Many film critics judge so harshly because they do not have the patience or understanding that comes with making a film. I’m trying to make this sound as least-pretentious, or holier-than-thou, as possible. All of this is to say that it is extremely difficult to accurately judge something you have never done before.

I have made a feature film, it is a 100 minute documentary called “Jit.” I spent almost half of my teenage years creating it.

Creation of “Jit”

In the ‘twenty-teens’ there was a very specific image or stereotype people held in their minds when they thought of an independent rapper. A caricature of sorts in the form of an unfit, gun-flashing, face-tattooed, colored-hair, high on cough syrup and xanax, word-slurring nuisance. 

Around 2015-2019, a lot of these independent rappers were teenagers coming out of places in South Florida like Broward County or Miami. There was something very alluring about this lifestyle to middle/high schoolers; so much so that kids all over my South Florida home began calling themselves “Lil [any word here].” 

These children wanted to “make it” as rappers and they wanted to do so with minimal effort and in a timely fashion.

I had made a few music videos during this time in high school. In 2019 I made one for an old friend named Evan; he had been making music since 2017 and showed no signs of stopping. Usually these kids would make one or two songs and abandon their SoundCloud account altogether. 

After making another video for Evan in 2021, I decided a month later that I wanted to make a short documentary about him and his rapper friends. Their music had much better production value than any of the other teen “rappers” and I could see they were really passionate about their work. 

I wanted to make something that would shine a spotlight on these young artists and break the SoundCloud rapper stereotype that caused so many to disregard Evan and his friends. After about 6 months into filming Evan and the kids I met through him, I could tell this was going to turn into a different project entirely. 

What I filmed over the span of three years was a group of teenagers who built something incredible together with their own hands, voices, and money that served as a temporary escape from internal pain and fear.

Around my last year of shooting, I switched my college path to fully online classes so I could work a job that allowed me to pay for: an original score, additional equipment, festival fees, poster art, title art, and more.

After over a year and a half working at my screenprinting job, I decided to quit so I could work full-time on “Jit.”

Going all in

Upon telling my boss I wanted to quit, I was full of fear. What did I just do? Am I crazy? Maybe so, but after my first full day editing, I realized I had made the right choice.

My daily routine for the next few months consisted of: sitting down at 7AM, setting an eight hour timer and editing until the timer went off at 3PM.

After my first rough cut, I spent an additional year, on and off, editing the film and tweaking the smallest of details that I knew an audience would never notice. 

Rejection after rejection piled in from film festivals and illusions of grandeur became harder to maintain. I submitted to those festivals because I hoped it could be screened in a theater somewhere.

Premiere Day

I owed it to myself and the rappers I had met to throw some sort of screening. I bought a ten foot screen, rented a projector, and gave myself permission to borrow around 40 foldable chairs from neighbors, relatives and a country club.

The last of my money went towards renting out a warehouse for a night and premiere T-shirts to give to cast and crew. Dozens of people in the film as well as their families and friends came to watch “Jit.”

It was the most nerve-racking moment of my life and the final week of editing, promotion, stealing chairs, uploading trailers and planning the event probably gave me a few gray hairs on my otherwise youthful head.

How I Review Films

This is not me stroking my own ego or feeling like I have to prove myself to any potential readers.

I am simply saying that when I review films, I am looking at them through the lens of a filmmaker. I am viewing them as someone who knows what it’s like to lack coverage in certain scenes, to lose footage, to deal with unruly cast and crew, to have technical issues and a limited budget.

While many films are very flawed, and don’t get me wrong, deserve critiquing, they can be criticized constructively and sympathetically. Film is a collaborative medium and many factors are outside of a director’s control.

Filmmaking is not even close to being the most important career in the world. It is infuriating and stupid, a waste of money that is pretty useless. But it’s so much fun and someone has to do it, right?

How can film be pushed forward without a love and respect for the craft? 

We live in an age where we are surrounded by nonstop, reactionary and lazily-made content. Headlines and videos tailored specifically to confuse and enrage because that’s what gets clicks and eyeballs.

I aim to be more thoughtful in my criticism and highlight strengths of even the most irredeemable films.

I’m not saying I’m a better movie critic, but I try to be a more sympathetic one. 

Movies are fun!

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